In 2023, information about Lilith, who goes by toxiccwaste0 on TikTok, went viral when she admitted to having feminine narcissist traits, which included skillfully manipulating individuals up to now. She was formally identified with Narcissistic Character Dysfunction in 2021 however now describes herself as a “reformed narcissist.”

Narcissism is a collective time period for individuals with a character dysfunction known as Narcissistic Character Dysfunction – NPD. Based on Dhriti Bhavsar, counselor, MSc. in Medical Psychology, “A number of the identifiers of a narcissist girl are a grandiose sense of self-importance and entitlement, preoccupation with fantasies of success, brilliance, magnificence and many others. and interpersonally exploitative habits.” Merely put, the definition of a narcissist girl, within the context of this text, could be a girl who has Narcissistic Character Dysfunction – NPD.

Studying about feminine narcissist traits is necessary, particularly if you’re in a relationship with a narcissistic girl. Most of the traits, particularly within the milder circumstances, are just like circumstances of Borderline Character Dysfunction. They are often so refined that differentiating between the 2 problems might be fairly difficult, even for a psychological well being skilled.

What Is Feminine Narcissistic Character Dysfunction?

The incidence of NPD appears much less within the case of girls. Within the narcissistic feminine, the signs might be much less extreme, making detection tough. As to the best way to establish a narcissist girl, sure apparent narcissist traits in females can assist with that. “This can be because of the over-representation of males in analysis and literature,” in keeping with Dhriti. “Girls are prone to present susceptible narcissism or covert feminine narcissist traits. These may manifest in traits akin to shyness, hypersensitivity, and obvious low shallowness.” 

Statistics present that solely 4.8% of females will develop NPD as towards 7.7% of their male counterparts. Express traits of a self-involved feminine will depend on a spread of things relying on the kind of narcissism. Each women and men narcissists share a number of frequent traits. Regardless of the extensively held perception that extra males are narcissistic than girls, a examine reveals that there was no systematic evaluation to determine the magnitude and stability over time of this gender distinction.

A number of the several types of Narcissistic Character Dysfunction are:

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• Overt narcissist (grandiose narcissist): Extra frequent amongst male narcissists, grandiose narcissism is characterised by grandiose habits and entitlement
• Covert narcissist (susceptible narcissist): Covert feminine narcissist traits current as shy, reserved, and insecure
• Communal narcissist: One who seems to be very giving and selfless with their money and time, all the time utilizing charity as a way to advertise their picture
• Malignant narcissist: One who combines the traits of NPD with Delinquent Character Dysfunction and might exhibit a harmful lack of empathy whereas preying on others
• Wholesome narcissist: As characterised by some professionals, they have an inclination to exhibit excessive shallowness together with different NPD traits, however these don’t appear to trigger issues for them (these are particularly difficult to diagnose)

Some research point out that narcissist traits in females may be extra of the covert or communal kind, whereas overt and grandiose narcissism is greater within the case of male narcissists. In feminine narcissism, the variations could also be attributed to gender roles. A examine reveals that as in comparison with male narcissists, feminine narcissist traits embody:

• Much less extreme traits that characterize NPD 
• Much less grandiose and entitled habits 
• Decrease ranges of bodily aggressiveness 
• Higher empathy ranges
• Higher emotional sensitivity

These traits are inclined to make it tougher to make a prognosis, so feminine narcissists have a higher likelihood of being misdiagnosed.

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13 Feminine Narcissist Traits You Ought to Know About 

You will need to know the best way to establish a narcissist girl. She tends to exhibit covert feminine narcissist traits. A examine reveals that she tends to be much less impulsive and entitled in her habits whereas additionally being extra empathetic than her male counterparts. A narcissist girl may even are inclined to have sure distinctive traits, akin to being continuously fixated on their look and a higher tendency towards jealousy and envy. 

Dhriti provides, “They arrive throughout as extra needy to garner extra consideration and sympathy from individuals round them. They’re often much less aggressive and entitled than male narcissists however sure, they do are inclined to be slightly extra empathetic.” 

Listed here are 13 narcissistic traits which are frequent amongst feminine narcissists. An growing old feminine narcissist might exhibit a rise or a lower in these traits relying on her age and psychological well being entry.

1. They’re extraordinarily self-centered and self-absorbed 

Being self-centered or self-absorbed is a major narcissistic trait of these with narcissistic character dysfunction. Identical to a male narcissist, a feminine narcissist has an inflated sense of self and can go on endlessly about herself and her life with out paying any heed to others. 

• Feminine narcissists is not going to ask how others are doing  
• Makes an attempt to vary the topic of a dialog might be met with disinterest whereas they are going to rapidly convey the topic again to themselves 
• They like to speak about their actual and imagined accomplishments, and might be fairly egotistical
• Intimacy with them could make you suppose that all the pieces is about them

2. A narcissistic girl will hardly ever apologize or admit fault

Feminine narcissists won’t ever admit to being flawed and can by no means apologize. They may, as a substitute, try and blame different individuals for something that goes flawed moderately than take duty for his or her phrases or deeds. 

A feminine narcissist will:

• Twist the state of affairs by deflecting blame onto another person
• Not care in regards to the impact it may have on that individual
• Be extraordinarily manipulative 

3. Narcissistic girls might be extraordinarily petty

An incapability to have a look at the larger image makes them extraordinarily petty and nitpicky. Typically, a narcissistic girl will get caught on small issues that appear irrelevant in an try to put blame elsewhere. A feminine narcissist can obsess over the smallest of slights. The obsessiveness can result in deep resentments which will compel her to hunt revenge. The tendency to fixate on perceived wrongdoings is on the root of their petty and jealous nature and makes them come throughout as extraordinarily bitter individuals. 

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4. Narcissistic females might be obsessive about picture and social standing

Whereas a standard trait of each women and men with NPD could be a shallow and superficial nature, this trait manifests as being overly materialistic in narcissistic girls. In consequence: 

• Feminine narcissists are high-maintenance girls, overly involved with model names and different standing symbols that mirror wealth
• They’re additionally obsessive about bodily look, picture, social standing, and social media

5. Self-absorbed girls with this dysfunction are often hooked on social media

The self-absorbed trait of a narcissist is exhibited in a different way in females than in males. Right here’s the way it manifests in girls:

• Feminine narcissists are extra wrapped up of their social media accounts and continuously submit selfies whereas publicly documenting each side of their lives
• All this in an try and get extra likes and followers on-line
• Their involvement of their on-line persona is so full that they could have bother distinguishing between their digital and actual selves
• They’d moderately be on their telephones than spend time with their pals or companions permitting their relationships to endure from this neglect

6. Narcissist girls are specialists at exploiting others

An exploitative nature is among the most distinguished feminine narcissist traits in relationships. Lilith, the TikTok person who was identified with NPD, mentioned in one of many movies, “Every thing that I mentioned or did was deliberate and thought out to get reactions and to get individuals to do sure issues… So I pushed individuals to essentially unhealthy locations… in order that I may have extra management over them.” Clearly, feminine narcissists are adept at exploiting others for his or her private acquire. 

On this trait, they’re no completely different from their male counterparts. Nevertheless, feminine narcissists will use manipulative ways which are completely different from those utilized by males. For instance, research present that they are going to use manipulative and passive-aggressive behaviors of their exploitative makes an attempt extra typically than males. The emotional and psychological toll that’s extracted from their victims is identical. These embody a way of disgrace, emotions of helplessness, and emotional flashbacks. Power circumstances might even expertise signs just like PTSD.

7. Girls with NPD are extraordinarily useless

Each male narcissists and feminine narcissists are extraordinarily useless, however within the case of the feminine narcissist, this often interprets into an enormous fixation on their bodily look. The obsessiveness with their look reveals up like this:

• They’re extraordinarily delicate to any feedback directed at their look, weight, and attractiveness
• Essentially the most innocuous of feedback might be misconstrued as criticism, making them fly off the deal with
• The obsessiveness with look can lead to excesses akin to excessive dietary habits and extreme beauty surgical procedure

8. A narcissistic girl will use her sexuality to control

Dhriti says, “A narcissistic girl will use sexually coercive ways akin to seduction and threatening to depart. Conversely, males choose to make use of a extra bodily coercive method to attain their ends.” If you’re courting a narcissist, you’d be capable to relate to those feminine narcissist traits in relationships: 

• Utilizing their intercourse attraction to control others to their very own ends
• Carrying revealing garments and utilizing numerous make-up to boost their sexuality
• Sexual seduction, also called “sexual narcissism.” It is part of their armory and is used to control others 
• Involvement with individuals who can assist or help them of their endeavors – A type of parasitic sexual relationship

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9. Feminine narcissist traits: Showing shy and reserved

Feminine narcissists are sometimes of the covert narcissist kind. This implies they have an inclination to vary from the standard narcissist of their outward habits. 

• They have a tendency to not be too grandiose, entitled, and smug however as a substitute current as shy and withdrawn people who’re insecure 
• This insecurity and low shallowness are often current together with different narcissistic traits that point out covert narcissism
• The shy and reserved nature of the feminine narcissist could seem at odds with their self-importance and fixed want for approval 
• This is the reason they could are inclined to keep away from giant gatherings and like smaller and extra intimate ones with individuals they’re aware of

10. Narcissistic girls might be super-sensitive

The feminine narcissist tends to be extra emotional than her male counterpart and is much more delicate to feedback with an inclination to overreact.  

• Feminine narcissists continuously misconstrue what’s been mentioned as they take all the pieces personally, imagining slights the place none had been meant 
• This over-sensitive, self-centered nature and low shallowness trigger them to be simply offended and damage
• Their reactive nature makes them liable to lashing out at others
• Feminine narcissists additionally are usually extra moody and emotional and might abruptly withdraw into themselves when upset

11. They are often clingy and overly dependent

Feminine narcissists exhibit very clingy and dependent traits of their romantic and different relationships. Dhriti says, “They overly spend money on relationships and have a tendency to see their associate as an adjunct. The low shallowness of a feminine narcissist will make her continuously search out reward and reassurance from these round her. With out this reward and reassurance, she might turn out to be moody, withdrawn, and reactive. She is going to attempt to stay in management by understanding the associate’s psychology.”

12. Narcissist girls are often manipulative

Analysis has proven that feminine narcissists are extra possible to make use of manipulative ways akin to passive-aggressive habits to control others to additional their very own egocentric agenda. That is not like the male narcissist, who tends to be extra bodily aggressive. 

Additionally they continuously play the sufferer by attempting to look helpless and susceptible. This trait is usually used at first of a relationship, serving as a solution to lure somebody in. Feminine narcissists additionally play the sufferer card to get somebody to do issues for them. This frequent trait of the feminine narcissist in all probability has some linkage with conventional gender stereotypes. 

Different frequent manipulative and passive-aggressive ways employed by the feminine narcissist would come with:

• Guilt-tripping
• Going behind somebody’s again
• Giving them the silent remedy
• Gossiping
• Utilizing gaslighting phrases
• Spreading false rumors

All of those might be simply as dangerous to the sufferer as bodily aggression, which is why these types of abuse have been termed narcissistic abuse. 

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13. Their relationships are usually short-lived

A person’s general stage of functioning is a helpful gauge of the severity of their narcissism. A feminine narcissist with a better stage of NPD will are inclined to have shorter and extra unstable relationships of their private {and professional} lives. This incapability to kind steady relationships can translate into many outward manifestations. Feminine narcissists might:

• Be unable to carry down a job for lengthy intervals
• Have bother growing and sustaining intimate relationships and lasting friendships
• Have bother caring for their monetary affairs

All of those narcissistic traits on this character dysfunction should not have to be current for a lady to be thought of a narcissist. These traits might be current in a feminine narcissist in varied combos and with various intensities.  

Additionally, the growing old feminine narcissist might exhibit an elevated stage of narcissism, with some specialists attributing this elevated narcissism to a way of entitlement that comes with age. The mixture and intensities will assist an MHP diagnose the kind of narcissism offered and its place on the spectrum of NPD. 

6 Suggestions To Deal With Narcissist Girls

Coping with a narcissistic girl will not be a straightforward feat and might be annoying at one of the best of occasions. Whether or not she is a member of the family, a associate, or a feminine good friend, a relationship with a girl with such a character dysfunction can develop into fairly a poisonous expertise. Studying to cope with such a character whereas additionally safeguarding your well being, particularly when you’ve got psychological well being points, might be fairly difficult. 

Listed here are a number of suggestions that can assist you cope with a narcissistic girl. The truth is, they can assist you cope with each female and male narcissists.

1. Get to know her behavioral patterns

Dhriti suggests, “Be taught extra about NPD. This may assist you perceive the ways and behavioral patterns a feminine narcissist makes use of to control and preserve management. These will embody ways akin to enjoying the sufferer, attempting to induce a guilt journey, and gaslighting. Take note of these, as it could assist you establish the patterns of a narcissistic relationship and keep away from falling for them. Holding a diary of those occurrences can assist, however be sure you hold the diary locked away safely.”

2. Set boundaries and implement them with narcissist girls

This will show to be tough if you’re in a relationship with a narcissist, however it’s all the extra important then. Boundaries will assist lay down what is suitable and what’s not within the relationship, one thing that can assist you keep away from narcissistic abuse. Dhriti says, “It’s important to study to talk up when somebody does one thing uncomfortable. By setting wholesome boundaries, you’ll shield your self from changing into a goal of their manipulative efforts.”

3. Deal with constructing your shallowness

Dhriti suggests that you simply concentrate on build up your shallowness and self-worth. It’s because each female and male narcissists often prey on individuals with low shallowness, as they are usually simpler to control. Participating in optimistic self-talk and practising optimistic affirmations, whereas avoiding negatives in your statements can assist you obtain that. 

4. Keep away from validation and criticism 

Don’t feed a feminine narcissist’s want for gratification. Lower off this narcissistic provide of paying an excessive amount of consideration to their each assertion or want. Doing this will solely serve to make you a sufferer of narcissistic abuse. On the similar time, keep away from criticizing or saying something that may very well be perceived as a menace, as they’re extremely delicate creatures. 

Dhriti provides, “Narcissistic females are sometimes very preoccupied with their private look and are extra liable to suits of jealousy and envy.” The narcissistic girl might lash out and search revenge when her self-image is threatened. Additionally it is necessary to notice that they’re extraordinarily aggressive people, so keep away from getting right into a aggressive state of affairs with one as you might be perceived as a menace.

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5. Don’t lose your mood

Coping with a narcissistic girl is a tough job and requires numerous endurance in your half. Don’t lose your mood, as that can cede management to her, one thing you need to keep away from. Shedding your mood tells her the place your buttons are. She is going to use this data to her benefit sooner or later and manipulate you to her benefit.

6. In search of assist can turn out to be necessary if you wish to deal successfully with a narcissistic girl

Should you really feel that your psychological well being is being affected by your relationship with a narcissistic girl or that you’re being subjected to narcissistic abuse, then you must severely take into account getting assist from a psychological well being skilled. A number of the indicators you must search for, indicating you need assistance, embody:

• You start to lose your shallowness
• You’re feeling depressed
• You start to doubt your self
• You start to expertise temper swings and emotional volatility
• You’re feeling anxious numerous the time
• You might be having issues with belief
• You might be more and more careworn

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Search for knowledgeable who’s skilled in coping with character problems, ideally with narcissism. This may make sure that you get one of the best assist. Simply so , expert and licensed counselors on Bonobology’s panel are all the time right here for you. A psychological well being professional can assist you to:

• Turn out to be educated about NPD and narcissistic traits
• Be taught to set boundaries
• Be taught efficient communication expertise
• Learn to address a narcissist particularly
• Learn to improve your shallowness

A narcissistic girl might be tough to identify as her narcissistic traits aren’t as simply obvious as a male narcissist. There are, nevertheless, sure frequent traits of narcissistic girls – Though of a decrease depth than males. They’re obsessive about picture and often hooked on social media because it feeds their narcissistic provide. They exploit individuals utilizing their sexuality and different instruments. Narcissistic girls are tremendous delicate to criticism and might be overly clingy and dependent. 

Due to these behaviors, their relationships are usually short-lived. When you acknowledge the traits of a feminine narcissist and establish their manipulative ways, you may keep away from enjoying into their arms and shield your self. Be sure you search skilled assist should you really feel that your psychological well being is being affected.

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